Flat-Out Love

Kickstart My Heart

2012-01-17T10:43:00.000-08:00

It's here! It's here!

As some of you may know, I've been working with a start-up app development group, DigiGlyph, over the past four months. We are building an enhanced edition app version of Flat-Out Love that will be released for iPhones and iPads this spring. (It will be available in other formats in months to follow.) This is an incredibly exciting and innovative project, and my app team is absolutely amazing. The app will come with the complete ebook version and can be read as such, BUT the enhancements will take the book to an entirely new level. The concept behind this version is to create a much more immersive experience for the reader, one that goes well beyond a simple read. Still images, video images, music, pop-ups for all of the FB updates, emails, and chat messages, author commentary, three extra chapters (including a pretty steamy one!), and more will build on the story and pull readers in deeper to the Flat-Out Love world.

Now, I realize that to many of you this sounds like a strange concept. It took me a while to wrap my brain around it, too. We've spent years understanding reading in a very one-dimensional (or "flat," ha ha!) manner. This app version shatters that understanding... It's about experiencing the story in a multi-dimensional, multi-sensory manner. Imagine being able to read Finn and Julie's actual elevator chat messages in a way that makes them real. Imagine ambient video of an ocean playing behind the Polar Plunge text. Imagine hearing Julie's last email to Finn. Or video that alludes to Julie and Matt's night after Celeste's sleepover fiasco... Those are the kinds of things that will make this enhanced edition so outstanding and fun. It's very important to our team is that all of the extra content and experiences blend seamlessly; features fade in and out of the screen, controls are unobtrusive, etc. Features can be turned on and off, and you'll be free to hop around to your favorite parts of the book and activate as much or as little extra content as you like.

Recently, I was lucky enough to snag indie Boston band IN LIKE LIONS as the exclusive band for this app. Their music is just amazing and is all the things that Flat-Out Love is: emotional, layered, complicated, catchy, angst-ridden, full of love and heartache... I could not imagine a better match. Lead singer Troy's voice is simply gorgeous, and he's backed by a powerhouse band. Please "like" them on Facebook and visit their official page. They are releasing their new EP, Through Red & Blue, on Valentine's Day. I've heard a preview copy of this, and I guarantee that it will blow you away. It's absolutely perfect. You can download their first single "Sheets" from iTunes now.

Here are a few clips of Troy and the band doing "Far Away," which is going to be Matt and Julie's song for a few scenes.

I am totally thrilled to be part of this team: an indie writer teaming up with an indie band and a start-up app group? It's perfect. Collaboration at its best.

In order to bring you as much multi-media content as possible, we've got a KICKSTARTER page going to help raise funds. Kickstarter is a pretty cool site where people post information about all sorts of incredible projects they are working on, so it's really about people helping other people make their creative visions come true. It's got a great grassroots feel that fits in so nicely with our style. All money raised will go directly to building this app, and there are some fun tiered rewards (including copies of the app, t-shirts, and mini Flat Finns). If you're an Amazon customer already, payments are super easy to make, and we would be grateful for donations of any size.

And please sign up for app updates and promo opportunities on our landing page so that you keep up to date on our progress! We would love to get as many bloggers as possible involved. You can embed the Kickstarter video in your sidebar, if you like, and we'll have an embed option for the landing page soon.

Thank you so much to everyone who has made Flat-Out Love such a success so far. The reviews, blogs, features, and occasional gushing have blown me away.

Please

Please Meet The Penguin Plunger

2012-01-02T09:00:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite scenes in Flat-Out Love is when Julie braves the icy waters and participates in the Polar Plunge. Why she does this is complicated. It's very much tied up in Finn, wanting to prove a point, needing to challenge herself, grieving over her relationship with her father, wanting to numb her emotions.... and more.

A reader, Lysa Lessieur, let me know that her husband, Creig, was so influenced by Flat-Out Love that he is going to do the Penguin Plunge in NH in February. He generously agreed to share his decision-making process with me and my fans. (He's quite funny!) We'll also get a follow-up after he does this swim. I'm really quite moved by his story.

I'm quite moved that my book roused such action. One of the most wonderful parts of this is that Creig is raising money for the Special Olympics. Please show him some support and make a donation! You can learn more and donate HERE. Go, Creig! Go!

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My much older and decrepit wife, Lysa, asked me to tell you about my decision to take part in the 2012 Penguin Plunge. I have learned many things in my 33 years of life on this earth, the most important one being make your wife happy (I had to include my age...she hates it when I do that...so I guess I don't always follow the rules) so here goes.

Plain and simple, I was inspired by your book Flat-Out Love. Yep, I'm an avid Stephen King follower and my wife talked me into reading a young adult romance book. I've gotta say though, the characters intrigued me right from the first few pages. I can't believe I just admitted that on a public blog! I have always thought of myself as an adventurous individual; bungie jumping, motor cycle riding, or getting tattooed. What your book made me realize was that I had gotten a bit complacent and predictable. Now I'm not saying that I plan on running with the bulls in Pamplona, I do have two young boys after all, but I can delude myself into thinking I'm completely bad-ass by jumping in the Atlantic Ocean in February. The story made me realize that life is about taking chances, not settling and well, life is for living. This may be a small step to some, but in my world it's huge. I may very well end my story with a trip to the Emergency Room, but Finn wouldn't turn back and neither will I. Not only is this benefiting my delusional adventurous tendencies, but it also benefits the Special Olympics. Hopefully my wife will be waiting for me with a warm blanket and a reality check on the beach, but if not, maybe I can have a cool chat with Finn in my hypothermic state in the back of the ambulance. If anyone can get me a Flat Finn, I promise he'll join me-unfolded and in full form-in the plunge! Maybe just a snarky Matt t-shirt for warmth will suffice....pictures or video will follow.

Sincerely,
Creig Lessieur

Guest Reader: Chrystle

2011-12-16T09:41:00.000-08:00

A big welcome to Chrystle!

1. So, you’re a Flat-Out Love fan! Yay! Can you share a little bit about what you liked about the book? Do you have a favorite character? Scene?

I think what I liked best about this book was the honesty. It wasn’t picture perfect, it wasn’t the “norm”, but every characters struggle seems so relatable. I think that is why I fell in love with each character. There is also an underlying “What is going on here?” throughout the whole book that grabbed and me and hung on until I finished that last page.

My favorite character by far is Julie. I want her to be my best friend. Is she real? If so, please have her call me! Julie is so thoughtful, and smart and absolutely snarky! But she isn’t perfect. She makes mistakes and learns from them. Could she be any more endearing?

Favorite scene? Can I be tacky and just say the whole book? Okay, I think my favorite scene is the elevator debacle. The messages back and forth were witty, superb and hot! Her fear easing away as Finn talks her down from hysterics, and of course the comical atmosphere of Seth singing to her in the background. Now, let’s be more specific….favorite moment! When she thinks, “There was nothing more wonderful than the way he said her name. How did she had she never noticed that before?” *sigh*

2. I’m sending you on a date with Matt. Where do you take him for your night out?

I suspect I would be more inclined for a “night in” than a night out, if you know what I mean.

3. Have you ever had a “quirky” person in your life? Someone who didn’t play by social norms? Anyone who you regret passing by? (I’m thinking that we’ve all run into someone who maybe we didn’t give the chance that we should have. The odd kid in elementary school, the outcast in high school…)

This rings true with me. Actually, in 6th grade there was a “quirky” girl that just didn’t fit in. While she was nice, and fun, she was just odd. I shamefully admit that I treated her like she wasn’t normal. I would love to be able to reverse my childhood naivety and embrace her for how awesome she was.

4. Tell us about your general reading habits. Do you have a favorite genre? Favorite authors? Books you’d recommend to my readers?

My reading habits are all over the place! I am a hopeless romantic, and tend to pick books that have a certain appeal to that nature. Even if it’s a smaller role in a greater story, I need the romance! I love contemporary and YA romance, along with paranormal romance. Sometimes I’m in the mood for tragic romance, or perfect bubbly romance! You get the gist.

As far as favorite authors, I don’t think it’s fair to pick one! I love so many different authors for the special spin they put on everyday situations and the doors they open in my mind while I’m obsessesing over reading their work of art!

Books I would recommend (as I have read/plan to read them over and over):
Beautiful Disaster, Jamie McGuire
My Once and Future Love, Carla Krae
The Bronze Horseman, Paullina Simons
Eden Series, Nicole Williams
Between the Lines, Tammara Weber

I’m not including Flat-Out Love, because that’s a given J

5. Do you have a favorite reading spot?
I don’t have a favorite spot per say, but I love reading outside. My backyard and a book is the perfect escape!

6. Ebooks or print?

Tricky, tricky question! I want to say print because I love the feel and smell of a book. So overall, I think reading a book in print is the best overall experience. That being said, I read more ebooks on my kindle simply for convenience and ease. I read a lot more books because my kindle never leaves my side!

7. Finn is taking you on an adventure... something outside of your comfort zone. What crazy activity could he get you to try?

I would love for Finn to take me around the world and show me EVERYTHING! Hiking through the mountains in Belize, bungee jumping, sky diving, wind surfing…. The list goes on. The intensely adventurous Finn could talk me into doing just about anything.

Guest Reader: Laura

2011-12-15T13:19:00.000-08:00

Yay! I have a guest! I've done so many interviews that I thought it was time that I interviewed someone. And who better to talk to than a reader and fan, right? Please welcome the lovely Laura Dunaway.

1.     So, you’re a Flat-Out Love fan! Yay! Can you share a little bit about what you liked about the book? Do you have a favorite character? Scene?

What did I like about the book? Oh just everything. I really enjoy how you write and your sense of humor. I liked the development of Julie and her relationships with Matt and Celeste.

Celeste is my favorite character. She is so intense and beyond her years. She's very intriguing.

Favorite scene? Man, the fight between Matt and Julie towards the end was great. I loved how Matt just let everything out. I also enjoyed the final scene when Julie realized she wanted to be with him.

2.     I’m sending you on a date with Matt. Where do you take him for your night out?

Matt and I go to dinner at a nice restaurant then to a club after for drinks. That's the first thing that came to mind and it seemed to fit. He'd really like to take me to the computer store after dinner but I convinced him we'd do that another time.

3.     Have you ever had a “quirky” person in your life? Someone who didn’t play by social norms? Anyone who you regret passing by? (I’m thinking that we’ve all run into someone who maybe we didn’t give the chance that we should have. The odd kid in elementary school, the outcast in high school…)

This question is making me think. I'm sure I've been that person for others. I do have someone in mind. A very sweet girl who always seems a little awkward. I have not passed her by but I'm still trying to figure her out.

4.     Tell us about your general reading habits. Do you have a favorite genre? Favorite authors? Books you’d recommend to my readers?

I love love love mystery/suspense! I love the thrill and frustration of not knowing "who did it" and trying to figure it all out. The best is when you're completely surprised by who did it and it not being completely obvious. Favorite authors? I love Mary Higgins Clark, Harlen Coben, David Baldacci to name a few.

I also love fiction. I love to read a good love story. Some of my favorite authors for these are Kristin Hannah (she wrote one of my favorite books of all time Firefly Lane), I loved The Help by Katherine Stockett, and I love Jodi Picoult! Jodi is an amazing storyteller and always writes about much needed topics.

My most recent discovered authors and books I love? Oh, someone named Jessica Park and her book Flat Out Love and Jamie McGuire and her book Beautiful Disaster. Both books are great great love stories and draw you in from the first word. I couldn't put them down.

5.     Do you have a favorite reading spot?

I have a few. My bed is my most favorite. I need to be lying down and really comfortable when I read. I also love the couch in my family room. It's nice and comfy.

6.     Ebooks or print?

Nothing will ever beat print, in my opinon. I love going to the library or bookstore and just thumbing through a book and taking it home.

BUT

I also LOVE my Kindle and being able to get a book I want to read in an instant. The Kindle is never closed so I can always get the book in no time flat. I think Ebooks are a great invention and certainly something we've needed.

7. Finn is taking you on an adventure... something outside of your comfort zone. What crazy activity could he get you to try?

I am so not a daring person so there are many he could get me to try. Of course, skydiving comes to mind because of your book. That is something he may be able to get me to do. As long as he promises to keep me safe the whole time. :)

What else?

-Going to a haunted house would be an adventure for me since they scare me to death!
-Skinny dipping because wow, that is also very intimidating
-Rock climbing because I'm always afraid I'll fall.

So yes, Finn has a few choices of taking me on an adventure to try. :)

*Note: If you'd like to be featured here, just answer these questions and send them my way!

Darkride is on the Way!

2011-11-16T13:10:00.000-08:00

My good friend, Laura Bradley Rede, will be releasing her book, Darkride, in December. Congratulations, Laura! I know what a huge amount of work it takes to complete a novel, and Laura has somehow manage to do with while raising three children. Miraculous! Please keep track of her on Goodreads and check out her website while we wait for her release day.

About DARKRIDE:
Ander McNair used to be the favorite son of a great monster-hunting family – until he was bitten by a werewolf and the hunter became the hunted. Now anything that makes his pulse race, even a kiss from his girlfriend Cicely, is enough to turn him into a monster. When he finally has his chance to earn his cure by killing a vampire prince, Ander finds he has to choose between his own past and the future of the girl he loves. Can a guy who’s not even human learn what it means to be a man?

Luke Marianez used to be an immortal vampire prince – until the witch he loved betrayed him and cursed him with the ability to die. Now he lives in the world of vampire blood bars where the waitresses are the drinks, and dreams about killing the last of the witch’s line so he can live forever. But revenge doesn’t just mean breaking the curse. He wants to break the girl's heart, too. Can Luke seduce Cicely without falling in love himself?

Cicely Watson doesn’t believe in werewolves or vampires. She’s not even sure she believes in true love. But she’s about to discover what all werewolves know:

People change.

Beautiful Disaster

2011-11-14T12:24:00.000-08:00

Wow. BEAUTIFUL DISASTER is awesome fun. The heat between Travis and Pidge? Best I've ever read.

What Jamie McGuire does so perfectly in this book is that she gave me what I wanted to happen, not what she *should* have done. And not what a publisher would have made her do. Equally important is what she *didn't* do, i.e.;no pregnancy scares (I think we're all sick of reading about those). This is not a book about morals and ethics, but it's not supposed to be. It's about watching the characters and their relationships and understanding their behavior as Jamie trickles in information about their pasts. Enjoy the ride because it's a fantastic one.

The relationship between the leads is steamy, obsessive, volatile, and incredibly deep and believable. But again, Jamie did not go too far with this. No one is physically or mentally abused, but rather the relationship's inherent intensity and the characters' personalities give the perfect backdrop for the many ups and downs. And the college-age piece works perfectly. God, I remember how emotional relationships could be then, how it was so easy to go from one extreme to the other in a flash... That is captured so well in this book. And Travis? Look, I have never wanted to f...er, engage in naughty activities... with a fictional character as much as I do him. He and Pidge are flawed, but beautifully flawed, and that is what makes them so real. Bravo, Jamie!

Beautiful Disaster is available as an ebook through most online stores and just came out in paperback!

Goodreads Choice Awards 2011

2011-11-14T12:16:00.000-08:00

Wow! Flat-Out Love made it to the semi-final round of the Goodreads Choice Awards! This is incredibly cool. I have been absolutely astounded at the number of reviews my book has received on Goodreads. You guys are just amazing. I try to comment and thank as many readers as I can, but it's been hard to keep up. So please know that I really, really appreciate all of you who have taken the time to write such incredibly thoughtful and heartfelt reviews. It's overwhelming... I honestly don't know how to say what it means to me. (Pretty crappy response for an author, huh?)

Anyhow, go vote! Flat-Out Love would love your vote, but my pal Jamie McGuire's knockout book Beautiful Disaster is also up there... I'll leave it up to you. :)

OK, Fine. Science Is Cool.

2011-11-13T19:47:00.001-08:00

Earth | Time Lapse View from Space, Fly Over | NASA, ISS from Michael König on Vimeo.

I Love This Girl

2011-10-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

Wow. So there I am, checking Twitter, not expecting anything mind-blowing to show up. And then there is this. @ToBeReadOutLoud (also known as Brittany) has mentioned little me with a link to her blog post titled, "Why Flat-Out Love is the Best Book I've Ever Read." So, you know, that got my attention. Even before this totally flattering piece, I thought she was awesome. Incredibly funny, snarky, witty, quick-thinking, says nearly anything... All the things I love in a person. So start following her on Twitter, stalk her To Be Read Out Loud blog, and be a fan on her second blog. You'll like everything about this chick.

Yeah, this is a glorified book report. So what?

It gives me a chance to dust off my “raves” category.

I’ve been talking a lot about Flat-Out Love by Jessica Park on my other blog, Facebook and Twitter.

I’ve decided to classify it as the best book I’ve ever read.

I have to clarify (and go off on a tangent to talk about myself but this is my blog so I can if I want) by saying that I’m not much of a reader of great literature. I’ve never read Les Miserables or Bronte (Charlotte or Emily) or Lord of the Rings or probably at least 90 of the 100 Greatest Novels of All Time. I get distracted far, far too easily to read something in hard-to-understand English with lots of words and pages.

People seem to think this means two things:

1) I’m stupid, and

2) I don’t read.

I am neither of the above. I’m not stupid. I am actually quite intelligent. I know a lot about a lot of different things. I just choose to spend my time doing other things. Like researching and writing papers (and arguing) about how Steve Jobs brainwashed you into buying that expensive MacBook. I like watching TV. Lots of TV.

And I do read. Just not classic literature. I read news on the Internet. I read Gilmore Girls fan fiction. I read lots and lots of chick lit. It’s easy to read and fun. I like having fun. Reading “The Classics” is not fun for me. Stop judging me for it.

But on to Flat-Out Love. It is certainly not a classic to be compared with Les Mis or Dostoevsky. But it’s definitely one of the best, if not the best, love stories I’ve read.

I laughed. I cried. I laughed while I cried. It is incredibly witty. Creative.

And surprising. Yes, we know that the main character (Julie) and the main boy (Matt) are going to fall in love. But it isn’t just a mediocre plot surrounding the love story. The other characters are fascinating. They’re weird. There is a mystery (not a Nancy Drew mystery, but a “what the fuck is with this family?!” mystery) that literally had me gaping when I found out.

But I think the best thing about the book is that it’s one of those that I loved, but I’d love to read it again–I’ve already reread it twice since finding it a couple months ago.

There are some great books and movies that I loved, but I wouldn’t want to read or see again. Like The Count of Monte Cristo, one of the few books in English I actually finished reading the entire way through…and way ahead of schedule. I loved that book. But I wouldn’t read it again. It was interesting, but exhausting to read. Not a casual read. Flat-Out Love is a casual read, but better than your typical romance.

I mentioned Julie and Matt. One of the things I love about their romantic interlude is that Matt is nerdy. He isn’t “gorgeous” with “super hot abs” or whatever seems to be the case in all other chick lit. She learns to love him based on his personality rather than his awesome good looks. Because, you know, a real relationship isn’t built on awesome good looks. Though I do love myself a nerdy boy.

I’ll compare this to Meg Cabot, the queen of chick lit. It’s better. I’ve read and reread most of Cabot’s books (her recent foray into the super-popular paranormal romance has me sighing and I never liked Queen of Babble or the later Princess Diaries books) and I’d place this above them, which is pretty much the ultimate compliment I can give. Deeper, funnier, more surprising. Better in every way.

But it has ruined me for all other romantic novels because no matter what I find, I just think, “well…it wasn’t as good as Flat-Out Love.”

I’m not going to describe the plot because Amazon could do that for me. You should just read it. What are you waiting for?

And now I’m going to sleep. It’s 7:30 a.m. and the sun is rising in sunny Florida.

Been A While...

2011-10-13T17:56:00.000-07:00

Ack! Been a while since I've posted here, but I've got a lot going on, and my blog has slacked.

I'm working on a pretty big Flat-Out Love project and would love hear from you guys about your favorite scenes, memorable quotes, questions you have for me, etc. Send me an email and let me know! More about the big project later.... :)

There is a new page on this site, too, called Flat People. Send me pics of cardboard cutouts, Flat Stanleys, whatever you got, and I'll post them on the page. I know, I know. I have a weird sense of humor.

And just because it's a funny picture, here's a shot of my son facing his dinner. He had been pestering me about trying lobster, so I went ahead and cooked up two. He managed to get down two bites before vehemently shaking his head.... Oh, well. All the more for me!

Ohmygod, I Have A Guest!

2011-09-14T21:10:00.000-07:00

I have a blog guest! A guest blogger! Yay! I'm stunned and speechless. OK, fine, I'm not speechless. I have plenty of lovely things to say about Craig, who I was fortunate enough to meet through the miracle of Facebook. Where, I might add, I met my buddy and copy editor Jim Thomsen through whom I met Craig. (I'm pretty sure there's a Six Degrees of Jim game about to catch on.) Not only does he provide awesomely funny wall commentary, but he happens to be an absolutely fantastic writer. I was intrigued by the book description and glowing reviews of his book 600 Hours of Edward. One is always a bit nervous reading a book by someone you "know," because... Well, what if their books sucks, right? I mean, let's be honest, that happens. Fortunately, my reading experience was quite the opposite of anything resembling sucky. 600 Hours of Edward is... everything. Craig had me hooked within the first few pages (a true skill) and the entire book continued to keep me aching to read each next page. What a perfect cast of characters, each with a distinct personality, none more so than the lead, Edward. Edward's Aspergers and OCD eccentricities are handled so beautifully and so warmly that it's impossible not to fall magically in love with his story. Everyone that I have recommended this book to has come away with the same feeling I did: 600 Hours of Edward is perfect. You will all adore this book. There is nothing predictable or ordinary about it; unique in the most awesome way. Next, I'm moving on to The Summer Son, which looks equally engaging, and then to Craig's latest, a collection short stories called Quantum Physics and The Art of Departure. (Officially releasing in December, but keep reading for a treat!) I will be a fan of anything he writes, that I know.

So, short stories, huh? I'm impressed by people who write short stories. I've tried before and it's tougher than you might think. (Meaning that I'm not very good at it so I feel better saying it's tough.) This smartypants, however, could write the phone book and make it interesting. He's a creative guy. Once a week, he even asks FB friends to give him one word that he then uses in a short blog piece. So stop by his blog (see the link below) to find out more about him, read writing samples, and just generally, you know, swoon over how how damn cool he is.

OH, YOU WANTED A FREE GIFT?

Well, of course. You don't have to yell.

Go to SMASHWORDS and enter coupon code EY63S to get your free copy of Quantum Physics and the Art of Departure now through September 30th.

I encourage you to tweet and FB your little faces off about this, OK?

Now, on with this guest blogging gig that I paid him for. I mean, that I asked him to do.

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When Jessica and I were bandying about ideas for this post, she sent this message across my transom:

“Why does an idea become a short story rather than a full-length novel or a scene in a novel? And you have such a limited time to present characters, etc. and to get the ‘action’ going. Do you plan and plot the way you might with a novel? It seems incredibly tough to me. Is this more or less challenging for you? Just a different sort of challenge?”

Fool that I am, I took her up on this. If there’s anything I enjoy, it’s trying to give a definitive answer to questions with infinite possibilities.

How does a short story come to be? Really, I haven’t the foggiest. Among the 10 stories in my upcoming collection Quantum Physics and the Art of Departure , three were salvaged from failed novel projects, two were written as palate cleansers between my two novels, at least three were written during and drew inspiration from a self-destructive streak last fall as I did almost everything I could to dismantle my marriage (I failed, thankfully), and a couple bubbled up when I played games of extrapolation with past events from the lives of people I know.

Ideas almost never come to me fully formed; I’ll catch enough inspiration to get started, and then the surprises start coming. Early in my story She’s Gone, which is in the collection, the emotional center of my novel The Summer Son, a violent man named Jim Quillen, showed up. Surprised the hell out of me. But you know what? He belonged in that story. It wouldn’t have existed without him. I used to look askance at that kind of mystical writing chatter – “The story tells me where to go” – until I actually started writing them. But it’s true.

As for action, the most cogent thing I can say is that it’s best to start with some. I’m not a big fan of what I call throat-clearing – that meandering nonsense that you see in some books before the writer finally finds the courage to get to the meat of the thing. That said, I’ll allow that while some amount of this makes sense in novels, it’s absolutely deadly with a short story.

Here’s how my story Cruelty to Animals begins. I wanted to start with a punch to the nose:

We were done for when I bought the dog.

That’s what I’m thinking somewhere over Idaho, on a twin-prop sputtering toward Seattle, where I’m going to hunker down and try to figure out what to do next, now that my last next thing has fallen apart.

Look, we had problems. Who doesn’t? I might even be willing to concede that we had more problems than most people do, although you’d have to satisfy me that such a thing can be quantified before I’ll cop to it. In any case, I’m not going to fight the basic premise: We were a mess. We were two people living in two cities in two states in two houses, and we kept pretending that maybe someday those circumstances would change and we’d be together. You know what? I’m going to say now that maybe that was a lie. I don’t know. It didn’t feel like a lie, at least not always. I do know that we were making it work, even if it was dysfunctional as all hell.

Then I bought the dog, and now nothing works.

I’m not saying it’s the greatest opening ever written. But I suspect that most people who read it will want to keep going. In fact, I’m counting on it, which is why I’m giving away e-book copies of my collection for the next couple of weeks. Read it. Tell me what you liked and what you didn’t. Tell the world. I double-dog dare you.

As for rules about writing short stories: I don’t have any. For fiction to be alive and vibrant, everything has to be on the table. I will say, just as a point of personal preference, that I don’t really care for simply writing a scene and calling it a story. It can be a story, of course, but that usually happens when it also has a full arc, the promise of future change for the characters and other touches that make stories enjoyable to readers. Hell, Nicholson Baker wrote an entire novel, Mezzanine , that took place on a ride up an escalator. Anything’s possible, I suppose.

Perhaps the hardest thing about a short story is heeding what Mr. Bob Seger called “what to leave in, what to leave out.” If the yearning for exposition takes hold of you, your tidy little story can quickly become a menace.

To combat this problem, I regularly go to my favorite oracle of writing wisdom, Ernest Hemingway, who wrote this in Death in the Afternoon :

“If a writer of prose knows enough about what he is writing about, he may omit things that he knows and the reader, if the writer is writing truly enough, will have a feeling of those things as strongly as though the writer had stated them. The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one-eighth of it being above water.”

Isn’t that beautiful? Put more simply: Trust yourself and give the reader some credit.

Words to live by.

-Craig Lancaster

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Thank you, thank you, Craig for coming by! I'm honestly a huge fan. Now, everyone, start clicking and order one of Craig's novels. He is an incredibly gifted writer, crafting genuinely moving and smart stories. I would not lie to you. Promise

* "600 Hours of Edward" (2010 High Plains Book Award winner; 2009 Montana Honor Book)

* "The Summer Son" (2010 Utah Book Award finalist)

* "Quantum Physics and the Art of Departure" (short-story collection coming in December 2011)

Web sites: www.c raig-lancaster.com

http://about.me/Craig_Lancaster

Cardboard Cutout of the Day

2011-08-25T11:05:00.000-07:00

OMG. A combo cardboard cutout + geek = Rejoicing.

Get your own Sheldon here.

Goodreads Review... Wow.

2011-08-25T10:51:00.000-07:00

Maja gave me such a ridiculously lovely review on Goodreads and graciously gave me permission to reprint it here. This is the sort of thing that makes all of those late nights tweaking words and pouring my heart into big scenes worth it. Thank you!

The first review I wrote consisted almost entirely of incoherent gushing. This one is pretty much like that, but I did manage to include some useful info. Don’t expect much, though. I can’t remember the last time I felt this way about a book.

As a dedicated reader, I don't think I've ever connected to a story quite this much. There are so many books that are close to my heart for some reason or other, but there was never one so achingly familiar and mine. And it wasn’t just one character that I felt close to, but parts of every character and every situation. I recognized some of myself in Julie’s dedication to her studies, in Celeste’s quirks, in Matt’s courage and hidden vulnerability, in Erin’s absentness and denial. It was nice to be able to read a story and really understand.

I’m making it sound like a sad book, aren’t I? Well, it’s not. This is a book you want to read when you're feeling a little nostalgic and disconnected from the world. It will pull you right out. Flat-Out Love is surprisingly witty. During the first 80%, I thought I could describe it as my favorite summer read. However, the last 20% showed me that it’s so much more than that. Every emotional reaction the story evoked was very strong: when I laughed, I laughed so loudly that I woke the neighbors; when I cried, I sobbed like I was facing the end of the world, and in the end, I melted into a huge puddle of goo.

After moving to Boston to start attending college, Julie found herself living with her mother’s former best friend Erin and her seemingly perfect family of intellectuals. She soon became emotionally attached to every member of the Watkins family, especially the oldest brother Finn, whom she never met in person, but communicated with regularly via email.

”Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” (Leo Tolstoy)

I think there are two types of dysfunctional families: the ones that yell and the ones that are quiet – the latter being so much harder to portray. Character development is what Jessica Park should really be proud of. Her characters came alive for me, they became living, breathing people with problems, quirks and a sense of humor. Who could resist Celeste, a scarily intelligent 13-year-old who won’t leave the house without Flat Finn, a cardboard cutout of her oldest brother? Or Matt, a math geek with horrible T-shirts and a sense of humor that’s right up my alley?

Flat-Out Love completely changed my mind about self published books.I hope all of you will read it soon so we can gush about it together.

Latest Interview

2011-08-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

Lovely, warm, funny, sweet Maryse was kind enough to have me over to her blog for an interview!

Maryse: I’m dying to know. Will there be a sequel to the Flat-Out Love story?

Jessica: Hm…. I don’t know. Possibly. As much as I’m dying to do a follow-up, it would be impossible to bring the same sort of unknowns into a second book. I think that I could write a great story, but I’m not sure that it would be exactly what readers would want. The secrets, novelties, quirks that make FOL fun and meaningful are already out there. So, I don’t know! I really want to do some supplement chapters if I can find the time, and that may be as far as I can go. But I honestly miss the characters… It’s hard when you spend so much intense time “with” them and then finish the book. It’s a loss. A revisit of some kind. may be in order.

Maryse: I gasped at the surprise twist in the story! It took me awhile, but I love how the realization “came” to me, as a random thought (before the truth was revealed). Okay, I’m being a little smug Do you get any feedback from people who figured it out early on? How about from those who didn’t see it coming?

Jessica: LOL, this is a funny issue. The truth is that I really had NO agenda for when people got that twist. Some readers understand the book in one way in early chapters, some gradually pick up on it, and others are conked over the head with it in the end. I have read plenty of reviews where the reader says something along the lines of, “I think I figured out the secret much earlier than the author intended, but it didn’t really matter because I still liked the book.” Honestly, my intention (and hope) was that the book would read well no matter what. If the point of the story was the “secret” or the “twist” then it wouldn’t work. It’s about watching the characters’ progress and their willingness to grow, to see, and to accept. (Particularly Julie, since the story is told from her perspective.)

CLICK TO KEEP READING....

Cardboard Cutout of the Day

2011-08-15T15:41:00.000-07:00

This whole Justin Bieber cardboard cutout thing has gotten completely out of hand. You have to read this story about an unbelievably idiotic man who tried to steal a Bieber display. And, OMFG, look at his haircut.

"Dowling told cops, 'We were just having fun holding Justin Bieber hostage.'”

For a real treat, you should check out the arrest report. First of all, I have serious issue with the fact that the report includes--among other egregious grammatical errors--the phrase, "They then ran threw Sears with the item..." THREW? *slaps forehead* For God's sake. But I will forgive the reporting officer for this because the mental image of anyone running through Sears with a cardboard cutout is utterly delightful. My other favorite part is the tone of outrage regarding the thief having destroyed the sticky label on the Bieber... "The cutout label cost FYI $1.99 to produce..."

Monday is sucking a little less now.

Cardboard Cutout of the Day

2011-08-15T15:26:00.000-07:00

Aw, even Taylor Swift loves a good cardboard cutout!

New Copyright. Ahem.

2011-08-08T12:00:00.000-07:00

Grrrr. Nothing pisses off authors (well, most authors) more than finding illegal copies of their book all over God-forsaken file-sharing sites. We hate it. We love you, but we hate what you're doing. No, it is not flattering to see interest in our books. No, we don't care that you still buy other books. We care that you are breaking the law and acting like a dirtbag. I've heard all the arguments, blah, blah, blah, and I still think it sucks. I busted my ass writing Flat-Out Love. I charge a very reasonable price for the ebook, and in order to keep writing more, I need to make some sort of an income. So here's the new copyright info that I've added to Flat-Out Love:

"This efiction is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This efiction may not be re-sold. If you would like to share, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you're reading this efiction and it was not purchased for your exclusive use, then you should purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of all authors and helping the e-reading community to grow!

On a personal note, I will tell you that if I ever find out that you have posted this book on an illegal file-sharing site and pretended that you were using the site like a library, I will soak a geeky t-shirt in ammonia and beat you with it. Don’t go on those sites, don’t post books, and don’t download books. Not only is it illegal, but it’s a really dick move that completely disrespects authors. If we wanted our books on smarmy sites, we’d do it ourselves. And we don’t. If you know someone who is that desperate to read my book, but can’t purchase a copy for whatever reason, send them my way, and we’ll work something out. I want you to be able to read, but I also want you to play fair. "

Stay. Off. File-sharing. Sites. I'm begging you. And I'm not sure if you're supposed to say "dick move" in a copyright notice, but... Well, I did.

A Little Harvard Square-Insider Fun

2011-08-07T15:05:00.000-07:00

This is so, so Harvard Square. The chess tables have been there for years and are such an integral part of the feel of HS.

Takeout Fashion

2011-08-07T15:02:00.000-07:00

Look! This is so perfect for Erin!

And how adorable are these darling little laser-cut Chinese takeout cartons?

Geek Item of the Day

2011-08-07T14:54:00.000-07:00

Very important: The Evolution of the Geek.

Paperback!

2011-08-02T07:20:00.000-07:00

Yay! The paperback version is now for sale on Amazon! Amazon doesn't give me much flexibility on the price ($14.99), but it's not a terrible price for a 400-page book. As a little treat, I would be happy to send a PDF copy of the book for your e-reader to anyone who buys the paperback. Just email me with your receipt!

Wrapped Around My Finger

2011-07-31T18:50:00.000-07:00

This is the sexiest wrapping paper that I've ever seen. *swoon*

Oh, fuck. That was a little nerdy, huh? Don't care. This wrapping paper rocks.

F'ing Smart People

2011-07-31T18:44:00.000-07:00

Help me. Help me. Help me!

I am not an Ultimate Problem Solver, but I desperately want to be an Ultimate Problem Solver. I like crosswords, Sudoku, and all that stuff... I'm just not particularly good at any of those, and crap like this drives me crazy. Because I want to get it! I really do.

So go have fun, all you smart people. Show off.

Font Nerd Item of the Day

2011-07-31T14:17:00.000-07:00

Ohmygod. It's font nerd art! This is actually pretty awesome stuff, so click here to see more.

And Never for Julie. NEVER.

2011-07-28T16:52:00.000-07:00

Julie likes dining out as much as the next person. But it doesn't matter if Dinner in the Sky serves the best damn meal in the world, she would be unconscious before the menu arrived.

I will tell you that my first question was: WHAT IF YOU HAVE TO PEE? Turns out the whole suspended-dining contraption has to be lowered. It only takes a minute, but it's not exactly subtle.

Next Up For Finn?

2011-07-28T15:39:00.001-07:00

Or this nightmare of a vacation?

Um... Ugh.

Flat-Out Love in Paperback...Soon!

2011-07-26T13:53:00.000-07:00

My font nerd, Brian, will kill me for not having saved his gorgeous cover job in a proper way, so forgive the imperfect quality of the photo.... The real cover will be very nice.

I just uploaded my files to Amazon and am awaiting "approval" so that I can order a proof and then approve the book for sale. I'm going to try to keep the price as low as I can, but Amazon gives a base price that I must charge so I don't have much room to play. But, I will offer free electronic copies of FOL to anyone who shows me a paperback proof of purchase. I can do a Smashwords coupon code or send you a very nice and shiny PDF copy (the same perfectly-formatted one that I used for the paperback).

Font Nerd Item of the Day: A Video from Comic Sans

2011-07-26T08:27:00.000-07:00

OMFG. I am somewhat alarmed at how funny I find this video from the viewpoint of Comic Sans. Warning: If you don't like excessive swearing, you will not enjoy this at all. I, however, adore excessive swearing, so am entirely charmed by things like "While f'ing Baskerville is practicing the clarinet..." and "While Gotham is at the science fair, I'm banging the prom queen behind the wood shop."

I'm Comic Sans, Asshole from joehollier on Vimeo.

FOL Facebook Page

2011-07-20T14:17:00.000-07:00

Greedy Flat-Out Love has insisted upon having its very own Facebook page. I just follow orders from bossy ol' book, so here it is. You know the drill: click and like.

#yasaves

2011-07-20T12:39:00.000-07:00

I'm reprinting a guest blog that I did for The Zealous Reader on the WSJ/#yasaves incident. I wrote this after the articles appeared, but before Meghan Cox Gurdon and YA author Maureen Johnson did their now infamous radio interview. A good article can be found here, and you can listen to the interview (well worth your time!) here. Maureen Johnson did a remarkable job pointing out the total idiocy of Gurdon's attitude, and much to my pleasure, Gurdon was unbelievably even more insufferable than she was in her articles... sort of a Dr. Laura type crazy.

**********

Where to begin with the whole WSJ article (now articles) by Meghan Cox Gurdon? This is a huge topic, so I can just barely scratch the surface here. But I’ll start with this: The first article is obnoxious and annoying, and the second is pathetic. I think that the second one is particularly idiotic. I can’t entirely dismiss Gurdon’s articles because it is true that young adult literature today does offer many, many books with dark themes. Welcome to the world. This is nothing new. The subject matter may have changed over the years, but teens being interested in “forbidden” or “risqué” themes is an ageless truth. It’s totally normal. The articles read like a pissed-off puritanical housewife from the 50s who has been forced to watch an unedited Elvis gyrate on the The Ed Sullivan Show. (Although we all know that housewife was secretly loving every hip thrust. Perhaps the same can be said about Gurdon and YA literature?) Anyhow, Gurdon is clearly rolling her eyes at the backlash that resulted from her first article and seems dismissive and disrespectful of the young adult community. She would have done much better to write an article that raised issues for discussion and didn’t make such ridiculously grandiose statements.

Instead, her presentation completely sucked. But she’s obviously not interested in presentation or thoughtful discussion.

My first thought when the storm exploded was that Gurdon reminded me so strongly of book reviewers who write scathing reviews for the apparent pleasure of tearing someone else to shreds. You know those reviews that I’m talking about. The ones where the reviewer just rips apart a book and author in such a cruel manner that one quickly realizes that the nasty review says more about the reviewer than it does the book. That’s what Gurdon sounds like as she pitches a childish fit about young adult fiction. My advice to Gurdon: Don’t read books that you’re not interested in. Unless someone has a gun to your head, put the book down, back away, and read something else. I’ve never understood people who complain, “Ugh, this book was so awful that I could hardly stand to turn another page.” Really? Okay. So don’t. It’s pretty damn simple. She doesn’t like certain books, so she shouldn’t read them. There are millions of books to choose from, so go read some squeaky clean thing.

Gurdon writes, “Entertainment does not merely gratify taste, after all, but creates it.” Fair enough. There is no denying that there are popular culture trends. Young adult paranormal books, for instance, have grown in popularity. Publishers and authors are feeding that interest. For lots of people, books are a business, and some authors choose to write for a current market. There’s nothing wrong with trying to earn a living and producing a product that will sell. But, there are also plenty of authors who write very tough stories about teen issues because these stories can help readers feel less isolated. They have characters with whom they identify, or with whom they have nothing in common at all but are nonetheless interested in. So what if a teenager wants to read a “dark” story? Frankly what I care about is that teens are reading. Really reading. The boom in the YA market is nothing but fantastic, in my opinion. I’m thrilled. Reading anything is what is important here. Building vocabulary, intelligence, creativity, and getting the brain working hard… all of that. I also think that losing oneself in different kinds of fictional characters and relationships and plots gets us all thinking about real life, too. How we connect with the world. Readers are smart enough to know the difference between fiction and reality.

Gurdon continues with, “Yet it is also possible—indeed, likely—that books focusing on pathologies help normalize them and, in the case of self-harm, may even spread their plausibility and likelihood to young people who might otherwise never have imagined such extreme measures.” I really hate first statement. If a reader begins cutting, for example, after reading a book about a cutter, one can obviously not blame the book. One could, perhaps, say that, yes, the idea for that behavior stemmed from a fictional story, but the book in no way caused that particular manifestation of some sort of underlying psychological issue. The truth is that had the behavior not been cutting, it likely would have been something else. And I don’t have figures, but I would suspect that the number of teens who read a book about something that Gurdon considers unsavory and then suddenly act on themes from the book is probably minimal. (“Gee, I just read a book about bullying, so now I have the sudden urge to go beat up some random kid. Awesome idea!”) I grew up during the Flowers in the Attic craze, and I can guarantee you that had I had a brother, he and I would not have started an incestuous affair just because I’d devoured every book in that series. But the stories were intoxicating and salacious and naughty, and my friends and I loved every word.

I do, however, think that it is important that parents be aware of what their child is reading, in the same way parents should be aware of other things going on in their child’s life. If a teenager is only reading deeply disturbing stories of violence, abuse, etc., it’s important for an adult to figure out if there is a reason for that. But the same can said for almost anything; only sadistic music, only bloody video games, etc. It’s not really about books at all. What’s more important is to look at the teenager’s life as a whole. If you’ve got a kid who devours every supposedly-controversial book/game/movie/song she can get her hands on, but has solid social relationships, etc., and a generally “healthy” life, who cares? Books are not the source of a troubled teen.

And there are always other choices. The implication that the only stories available for purchase these days are books filled with “ugliness, barbarity, dysfunction and cruelty,” is silly. Yes, actual shelf space in one of the few brick-and-mortar bookstores may be dominated by “darker” stories because that is what’s selling. Bookstores are struggling beyond reason to stay alive today, so from a business perspective, they’re making a smart move. But, my God, that’s not the only way to browse books. Get on the internet, go talk to a librarian, talk to other people, and find out about other genres.

One of the upshots of these WSJ articles is that it’s been absolutely wonderful to watch the YA reading and writing community rally together. The #yasaves hashtag is a whole separate blog (!), but I’m so proud to be part of a community where people share such intimate and personal stories about the saving and healing power of books. Gurdon and others will probably write more condescending pieces about today’s YA themes, but I might not even bother to read them. Because in the end, I see Gurdon as one of those annoying internet trolls who goes around posting flaming comments with the sole purpose of inciting anger. Her articles are more about her need for attention than anything else. Let’s go back to reading and writing.

Contest

2011-07-20T11:59:00.000-07:00

The lovely Jen at A Book and a Latte gave FOL a wonderful review yesterday and has an interview up today. She is also running an easy-to-enter contest to win a copy of the book!

From her review:

I know this will sound cheesy, but Flat-Out Love is the first book in a long, long time that has touched me this deeply. I could relate to so many aspects of this book. I felt that Park did an excellent job of delicately capturing the aspects of dysfunctional families while tackling some difficult issues. This is a story about love and loss, family and tragedy.

Flat-Out love is a memorable and fantastically romantic story that I know I’ll be reading again and again. I highly recommend this book!

I Will Have My Picture Taken With the Royal Couple No Matter What!

2011-07-11T07:43:00.000-07:00

The Flat People will one day RULE THE WORLD, I tell you!

"Only the lucky few got the privilege of having Will and Kate pose with them for a picture on Canada Day. But in Major's Hill Park, the Royal newlyweds were available all day, and their smiles never once faltered. In fact, the two never even blinked."

Check out the slideshow here. It's simply unbelievable.

Seriously. People f'ing stood in line to have their picture taken with the cardboard couple. Seriously. I'm speechless. And sooooo delighted.

Oh. Well, brrrrrr.

2011-07-11T07:37:00.000-07:00

I think I should let Julie know about this:

"Four hundred people stripped naked and plunged into the sea off Waleson Sunday in an attempt to break the world record for the biggest skinny-dip."

Zoooommmmmbbbbiiieees.

2011-07-11T07:34:00.000-07:00

This has nothing to do with anything, but it makes me laugh more and more each time I look at it:

Review from The Zealous Reader

2011-07-07T06:09:00.000-07:00

Well, how lovely is this, huh? What a perfect review to read first thing in the morning. Thank you so much to The Zealous Reader for being part of the Flat-Out Love Tour!

I love that she addresses the lack of YA or YA-appropriate novels with post-high school heroines. And, yes, according to plenty of big publishing house editors, Julie's apparently flabbergasting and bizarre age (18) immediately disqualified Flat-Out Love for publication. But it's such a wonderful age to write about!

"Jessica Park stated that she had problems publishing Flat-Out Love mostly due to Julie's age. I would consider this a young adult novel because even though Julie's in university her story is more about her emotional relationships than her schooling. More teenagers would connect with her trials and tribulations than older adult readers. I hope publishers in the future would reconsider novels with older teenagers because they're missing out on a huge demographic of readers and some awesome novels. "

Stop by The Zealous Reader for the full review!

In The Company of Bloggers

2011-07-06T19:35:00.000-07:00

I'm over at SeeKRead today, talking about how fantastic book bloggers are giving huge smooshy kisses for all the help and support they've given me and Flat-Out Love.

Rules? What Rules?

2011-07-05T15:13:00.000-07:00

I'm kicking off a blog tour put together by the amazing Ashley from The Book Labyrinth. Today I'm over at Cindy's Love of Books with a guest post on writing for the YA audience.

Rules? What Rules?

So my approach to YA has been, um… well, essentially to ignore all the rules. Weird, right? I’m not a fan of following scripts, and convention, and doing what I’m supposed to. I don’t want to write what has already been done. I know that vampire books are selling like crazy, but I didn’t want to write those. I didn’t want to write something just because I thought it would sell or because it’s what the public supposedly demanded. Other people can do that better than I can. I wanted to write my book.

So I did. (Can you hear me singing? “I did it myyyyyy waaaaaaay!”)

And considering that Flat-Out Love sales have really started to take off (I’ve somehow sold over 200 books in a week! *Update* 200 in four days), and my Amazon rankings have been (for me) great, it wasn't a bad choice. Not that my sales numbers are staggering, but I’m really pleased. I trust readers more than I trust rule makers. So perhaps my distaste for conforming is paying off.

Now, the publishing industry will tell you a different story. They will tell you that unique does not sell. They want more and more of what they know (or think they know) pulls in huge sales. Not one of the big publishing houses wanted to publish Flat-Out Love. Editors loved it and threw tons of compliments my way, but they all insisted that it wouldn’t sell. I was told repeatedly that “realistic fiction” had taken a dive in the YA market (meaning that I had no vampires, etc. in the book), and that my eighteen-year-old heroine was categorically too old for the market. I thought that both of those things were ridiculous. However, I was well aware when I outlined this book that that eighteen would be considered an “unusual” age by industry standards. But I ignored that standard. The NY publishing industry is dictating what plots and characters should be. I’m just not interested in playing that game.

My character, Julie, needed to be a freshman in college for the story to work. It’s not a high school story. She is at an age when so many changes are going on in her life, and it’s really a pivotal time in terms of transitioning to adulthood, navigating romantic relationships, etc. And I refused to budge. It’s a unique story, and it worked the way it was.

I ignored a bunch of rules with Relatively Famous, too. It’s the story of a high school girl, Dani, who finds out that her father, Mark, is a B-list Hollywood action star, and she spends the summer with him in L.A. Yes, I did include a bunch of fun, over-the-top parties and some of the glitz and glamour that one would expect, but I also did a lot of things differently. It’s really about the relationship between Dani and Mark, and how the two navigate the really complicated transitional process of becoming father and daughter. Also, about one-third of the story is told from Mark’s perspective, a storytelling angle that might not be that popular among writers (er, or publishers). But I thought it was really important that readers witness what the father’s experience was, otherwise the story is a totally one-sided account from Dani’s viewpoint. Mark goes through so many changes during the course of the book, and so it adds an important layer of depth that would be otherwise be missing. YA readers are not stupid, and they can be trusted to appreciate an adult’s life.

So my approach to writing? Ignore rules; ignore what I think I’m supposed to do. And I try to tell a good story and trust that my audience will be there for me if I do that. Within that framework, I’ve learned that the more that I allow myself to be vulnerable, to put my heart and emotion into my writing, the more readers connect with the characters. It feels more risky to do that because if I do that and get hateful, scathing reviews, it’ll certainly hurt more! But the payoff is worth it. Nothing means more to me than to hear from a reader that she was up all night because she couldn’t wait to see what happened, or to hear that I made someone laugh, or cry, or feel something. So I’ll lay my heart out there again with the next book. Willingly.

Like Taking a Crayon From a Harold

2011-07-05T15:03:00.000-07:00

I think this is hysterical. Amazon lists YA books under the Children's category, and while I'm beyond thrilled to find my book bouncing around a top list of any kind, I couldn't help but laugh at the company I am in. Fantastic, adorable, and famous company, but nonetheless... Well, it's just funny.

Matt's Alarm Clock

2011-06-22T20:07:00.000-07:00

From the awesome site Unhappy Hipsters. The second I saw this, I thought of Matt. I'm sweet like that.

Attack of the Matts/Now You See It, Now You Don't

2011-06-22T19:22:00.000-07:00

I feel like babbling tonight, so hold on.

If you know me at all, you know that I'm in the throws of a Matt Nathanson attack right now. My imaginary and age-appropriate new boyfriend released his new album, Modern Love, yesterday. I'm nearly beside myself and fear I may succumb to some sort of swooning meltdown at any moment. I strongly suspect that he'll catch me should I collapse, but just in case I have spread pillows throughout the house should I happen to hit the floor. (Funny enough, he has a song called "Drop to Hold You" which is obviously about my impending love crash. Right?) I was never the teenage girl that had huge, annoying, all-encompassing crushes on teen idols, so I'm making up for it now. Hopefully in a less pathetic way, though.

This crush of mine is not actually a perverted, lusty deal. I just dig him. And I wrote a whole bunch of Flat-Out Love scenes to his music, so I'm sort of attached to him. I mean, to his music and lyrics. Fine... a little bit to him. He's not exactly lousy to look at. And I could write this same blog about a number of other musicians, but he's got the best ass, so he won this honor.

Anyhow, here's a link to an awesome interview that he did for Americansongwriter.com. There's a bunch of stuff in here that I love, including the fact that he says what moves him to write music is other music. I totally get that. I used to want complete silence when I wrote, but something changed dramatically for me when I wrote Relatively Famous. I started needing music to write big scenes. It just got more intense with Flat-Out Love. Listening to the right song would tap into a deeper layer of emotion. If a song could make me feel passionate, or vulnerable, or in love, or full of desperation and angst, then I can get that into a scene and make it read more strongly.

But that's hard and draining. And scary. Because when you pour yourself into something that's going to be put out there for other people to judge and react to, you are basically saying, "Here is my heart, try not to slice it into little bits, 'k?" You wonder if the emotion that you felt when writing will translate the way you want it to. Will you be heard? Will anyone care? Will you get someone to feel something? Will you move them? Haunt them? Reach them? Anything? What if you put all of your feelings out there and you get no reaction? Was it worth it to stay up until 2 a.m. all those night slaving over word choices? Does it matter that you wrote with so much emotion that you made yourself cry and needed tissue after tissue?

Does anyone care about Matt Wakins in Flat-Out Love the way I do? Did anyone kinda fall in love with him the way I have? Because to write about him, I had to do that. Does anyone totally adore Celeste and all her strange personality issues? Does anyone feel the way I do when Julie does the Polar Plunge? Or gets an email from Finn?

Well, you have to take that risk. If you want to create something good, you have to. I think Nathanson's new song "Mercy" is awesome. But it's not necessarily what you'd expect from him. So that's a risk, if you ask me. But artists of any kind are allowed to grow and try new things. We might get beat up--or worse, ignored--but we might get that one bit of feedback that makes it all worth it. We might move the one person that matters.

Because that what I want when you read Flat-Out Love. I want you to feel that same energy and rush of emotion that I felt when writing. I want there to be scenes that move you, shake you up, maybe even break you down a little. But at the same time, it's completely nerve wracking to know that my book is out there just waiting for you. And that makes me wonder: Does Matt Nathanson (or any artist, really) feel the same way about releasing an album? What if he wrote a song because of someone? For someone? Will they know? Will they feel that? Maybe it depends on the song/book... and how much of yourself and your heart you put into it.

You can't make people see what they don't want to, what they're not ready for, or what doesn't mean anything to them. It's one of the themes of Flat-Out Love. The characters see what they want to at different times. What they can handle. It's the disconnect between the heart and the head. And readers will see the characters and the story in different ways. It's killing me not to be able to say more, but I don't want to wreck the story for people who haven't read it. But I will say that what's important to me is that readers enjoy being a witness to how the characters understand things. The story is about being there for the journey.

Here's one of Matt's new songs, "Room @ The End of the World." This one guts me. I already know that I'm going to be writing some scene with this song on repeat. It makes me want to write. It makes me have to write. There is something about the tone in his voice, the crack, the sort of yearning feeling, that stirs me up into a creative frenzy. It gets ideas going, and I start feeling what two characters relationships could be. I love the whole idea of a room at the end of the world, rewriting wrongs we learned... Yeah, something will be written to this. And I think that's cool. Sort of a pay-it-forward, butterfly effect. He was inspired by song X to write song Y, and it means one thing to him, but another thing to me. So then I'm inspired by song Y to write scene Z, scene Z reaches a reader and they react in some way to that, etc. I love this.

So here's a video of that song. The 4 minute mark is about when I lose it. (And... not to mention the whole heavy breathing thing in the studio recording. Um... yeah. It's good.)

(I have to tell you that the most hysterical thing just happened. When I went to search for this video via Blogger's YouTube tool, one of the videos that came up was was called "Male Restroom Etiquette: All men of the world can find common ground in these simple rules of 'evacuation' etiquette." I have to watch this next.)

Okay, back to the article. Here's another thing I love: He wants to be remembered by the song "I Saw," which is a completely neglected and under-appreciated song. It also happens to be one of my favorites of his (see my Chapter Tidbits page).

And I just love a man who can balls out say that he wishes that he'd written Def Leppard's "Photograph."That is hot.

I will leave you with one more piece of awesomeness. If you grew up in the 80s like I did, you are more than familiar with George Michael's ass from the "Faith" video. Check out Matt's awesome play on that. And, fortunately for me, his ass:

Here's to the Matts who keep us awake at night. We all have one.

Poor Comic Sans

2011-06-15T06:29:00.000-07:00

Well, this is just sad. Not only is there a game in which you shoot at undesirable Comic Sans:

But there is a documentary project about the horrors of this miserable little font:

Comic Sans: The Documentary Teaser Trailer from scott hutcheson on Vimeo.

<sniff> Hand me the tissues.

Font Nerd Item of the Day

2011-06-14T06:53:00.000-07:00

Oh, boy. This is awesome. So worth the click.

Comic Sans Criminal

Interview at In The Name of Books

2011-06-09T18:26:00.000-07:00

The darling Neri was sweet enough to interview me over on her blog, In The Name of Books. I'm reposting it here, but please stop by her site and check out her wonderful book reviews!

Since I love twitter, I think it would be fun to see how you would describe FLAT-OUT LOVE Twitter-style. How would you describe it in 140 characters or less?

Majorly deep romance, biting humor, witty banter, earth-shattering heartache, and moving, complex, dysfunctional characters. All for $2.99!

What was the hardest part of writing the book?

With any book, it’s the first twenty to thirty pages. It is dreadful for me. Every word hurts to write. I like to write cleanly, with the intention of keeping those pages and not just throwing words out as a placeholder. Which is stupid. I could go back later and just delete early chapters and rewrite them… But I don’t. The early chapters are when I get to know my characters and how they behave, and it’s really slow going for me at that stage. Yes, I have a general idea of who they are when I finish an outline, but the details don’t become clear until I actually start writing.

With FLAT-OUT LOVE in particular, though, the really hard part was balancing what to tell and show with what was best left unsaid. There is a chapter at the end of the book that takes place on Julie’s last day of school. I don’t want to say too much here for those who haven’t read the book yet… but the first half of that chapter is more about what isn’t said between her and other characters, and what the reader doesn’t see. I hate when I’m reading a great story and then every damn stupid thought and detail is spread out and beaten to death. Readers are not dumb. They can fill in the blanks. And missing information is often much more telling and meaningful. What’s fun is when you react to a story with your heart, your emotions… not when you feel something because the author has told you what to feel.

I have a number of those types of scenes in the book, when one thing might be happening action-wise, but another thing entirely is happening to the characters (and the reader) internally.

I loved all of the characters in your book. Which one did you find yourself relating to the most?

It’s really a three-way tie between the leads: Julie, Celeste, and Matt. In many ways, Julie is so much like me. We’re both moody, and silly, and romantic, and driven to connect with and “fix” those around us. We’re better at taking care of others than we are ourselves. But even though I might technically have more in common with her, I know Matt and Celeste almost eerily well. They were so easy for me to write.

Celeste is extremely unusual (I mean, as far as I know, not many 13-year-old girls cart around cardboard cutouts of their older brothers, right? Or speak like an Oxford professor?), but her totally distinct and bizarre personality made her one of my favorite characters. As much as she and I are different, I know her better than Julie, I think. Same for Matt. He’s highly academic, totally geeked out, and socially pretty difficult… and he’s very guarded and evasive, while still being appealingly sweet. So, nothing like me. But again with this character, I know everything about him.
I could tell you exactly what Matt and Celeste would say in any given situation. It’s a strange experience to understand your characters deeply that they almost feel like real people, separate from the fictional world in my head. So although I may not relate to Matt and Celeste in terms of commonality, that distance between us made me need to understand them even better.

I love the Facebook status updates! Can you tell us more about these? And when did you decide that this was something that should be added to the book?

This was one of the first things that I knew I wanted in the book, for a few reasons. It fits in well considering that Julie and Finn’s relationship is an online one, and it’s also a way to add humor while showing different sides of the characters. Sometimes FB status updates say more about a person than what he/she can tell you themselves, and sometimes they’re just for fun. And then sometimes we try to read between the lines and see what we can figure out about someone… wondering if we can read a mood or a feeling, if that person is talking to us specifically... There’s a certain cryptic and quirky quality to witnessing someone’s online personality.

So I thought that it would be fun to start a bunch of chapters with Matt, Finn, and Julie’s status updates. The hitch was that it was much easier in theory than it was in practice. Anyone who follows me on Facebook knows that most of my updates have to do with current celebrity scandals (ie: senators soliciting sex by tapping their feet in bathrooms, Levi Johnston posing for Playgirl), weird things that my kid says, and any in-the-moment-hideously-un-thought-out thing that pops into my head.

For the book, though, I needed status updates that were not grounded in a certain event or year or person; they would have to stand the test of time and be funny ten years from now. And I suck at that. I knew exactly what type of updates I wanted; I just couldn’t come up with ones that were right, especially for Matt and Finn (because boys are, you know, weird). Julie’s were easier. So I went around Facebook and pilfered a whole bunch of good updates from people I hardly knew.

No, I didn’t do anything of the sort.

I asked permission.

My friend Dave was nice enough to give me about 90% of the updates for the book. He is both alarmingly smart and acerbically funny, and his status updates will still be brilliant years from now (whereas mine have the shelf life of an already over-ripe banana). So I spent hours scrolling through two years of his updates, gave myself a vicious case of eye strain, and yanked out my favorites. Half of them I had to toss because they were either too political for this book, or readers would be expected to look up half the obscure references. But the other half were perfect, and it killed me that I couldn’t use all of them. The ones that made the final copy of FLAT-OUT LOVE all still make me laugh, which is a good thing.

Here are a few of ‘em:

In order for this status update to make any sense, I need you assume I'm covered in some sort of spray-based cheese product.

See? I TOLD you that was fun! Now let's go find your eye.

You may call it "plagiarizing from the classics," but I call it "collaborating with the dead."

I put my pants on one leg at a time, just like everyone else. It's the way I take them OFF that makes me better than you.

Dave is on Twitter if you want to follow (or try to follow) him @whatdoiknow. Ask him to tell you how much he loves vampire romance stories. And then order him to write his own book and quit glomming on to my astronomical fame.

I noticed that you love listening to music while you write; if I picked up your IPod, what music would I find on your playlist?

A nonsensical mix. I’m not someone who listens to only one genre of music, and I will freely admit that I thoroughly enjoy a good pile of cr*p songs. I’m just not all that cool. I like to mix up older songs that I never get sick of with newer stuff, and I usually have two playlists in heavy rotation at one time: a slower, more mellow one, and then a faster list that I listen to when I’m on the stupid, loathsome treadmill.

Here’s some stuff from my current playlists:

“King of Anything” by Sarah Bareilles
“The Edge of Glory” by Lady Gaga
“Stand Back” by Stevie Nicks
“Shock the Monkey” by Peter Gabriel
“Gone” by Matt Nathanson (my pretend boyfriend)
“Everything’ll Be Alright” by Joshua Radin
“You Send Me” by Aretha Franklin
“I Don’t Need A Man” by the Pussycat Dolls
“Nothing Ever Hurt Like You” by James Morrison
“Circus” by Britney Spears (I can’t help it. I love Brit. I loved her better when she was a total nutcase, but not all crazy lasts forever. Unfortunately.)
“If Anybody Had a Heart” by Matchbox Twenty
“All Eyes On Me” by The Goo Goo Dolls
“Running Up That Hill” by Kate Bush
“Fast Car” by Tracy Chapman
“Fighter” Christina Aguilera (no song in the world makes you refuse to get off the treadmill more than this one)

See? I don’t really make any sense.

Did your music choices evolve throughout the writing process?

Definitely. Music is a huge part of writing for me. (Although that hasn’t always been true. I used to want TOTAL silence.) When I was writing FLAT-OUT LOVE, I spent a lot of time sitting outside on a lounge chair, eyes shut, iPod in hand, listening to music while picturing scenes. I’d flip through song after song until one of them hit the right mood for me. And then it would be on repeat while I imagined who would say and do what.

The right song can totally pull a scene together for me. I ended up with about ten songs or so that I listened to nearly incessantly while writing. All of the “big” scenes were written with music blaring through my earphones. It’s kind of that extra boost, a way to get myself into the right kind of mood to write what needs to happen. It’s the same way that music strong affects a movie scene… it can make or break what’s happening on screen.

Are you currently working on your next book? If so, what is the story about?

I am the slowest writer ever, I think. I’ve been mulling over an idea for a paranormal romance type book for months now, but I can’t get a handle on it. I really want the story to be about the characters and their relationships and not primarily about some “hook” just for the sake of a “hook.” The actual story needs to be the focus. I think a lot of the vampire and other paranormal books that are selling these days are more about the details of fabricated worlds. Those elements are fun, but as a series progresses, the ante gets upped, and some authors keep adding more and more implausible plot lines and fantastical components to feed the monster. And that bores me and belittles the quality of a solid story.

For me, a slower building story with complex characters is what really drives good fiction, and the paranormal elements need to play into that well, not be the driving force behind a story. (But that being said, I’m not saying what my paranormal elements are. Because they’re secret! And good!)

So, I’m working on it. I’d like to turn my idea into a series, possibly three or more shorter novellas. If I can get myself in gear, that is… *cough, cough*

Quick Fun Facts

Favorite Flower? Blue delphiniums. My mom adores true-blue flowers, and so I’ve planted a few in my garden for her.

Favorite Dessert? Ciao Bella Cabernet Blackberry sorbet. It’s insanely good. Luscious… and kind of sexy. If sorbet can be sexy, which I’ve decided it can.

Pets? A three-year-old Elkhound-mix dog named Fritzy, and two obnoxious cats named Gato and Inga.

Favorite City? Dude, what are ya f*ckin’ kiddin’ me? Baaaah-ston. (Although, if I say “Paris,” do I get to go there?)

Gorgeously Geeky

2011-06-03T12:39:00.000-07:00

Plains Milky Way from Randy Halverson on Vimeo.

Bonus Font Nerd Item of the Day!

2011-06-03T12:31:00.000-07:00

OMG. This is a flipping wonderful piece: "The Real Helvetica: A Designer Restores the Original Font." I'm not positive that this article is supposed to send the reader into a fit of giggles--and maybe it's because I've been awake since 4 a.m.--but this paragraph nearly made me spit out my Coolatta:

"Schwartz lists a litany of Helvetica sins. Early on, regular and Bold weights were altered, changing the relationship between the two weights because of technical limitations related to printing. Furthermore, when the family was adapted for the more advanced process of phototypesetting, "the compromises that had been made were kept as they were, rather than going back to the original, no doubt to keep type set with the two different technologies as consistent as possible." Then, in the 1980s, the Linotype Design Studio redrew the family, which had grown into a huge set of disparate weights and widths, as Neue Helvetica. "The Condensed and Extended demanded squarer curves and bowls, so the normal width got them as well, making the whole set into one extensive, consistent workhorse but sacrificing some of the personality of the original," Schwartz says. "My digital version of Neue Haas Grotesk is an attempt to bring this back to life as authentically as possible...Helvetica's detractors rail that it is boring, but after spending time working on Neue Haas Grotesk, Schwartz argues that Helvetica 'was never intended to be the cold, perfect, rational typeface people believe it is. There is a subtle warmth in the shapes that was lost over the years.'"

That last sentence kills me. Soooo serious! The amount of strong feeling that some people direct at fonts is just... it's mind-blowing. And ridiculous. And wicked funny.

2011-06-03T10:43:00.000-07:00

Uh... Can someone tell me why this is funny?

Font Nerd Item of the Day

2011-06-03T10:28:00.000-07:00

Oh, my. Well, if you're, like, totally into fonts, you can dress your house up in font decor! Not only are there fabulous Fontables:

But plenty of fun accessories from House Industries:

A stunning ampersand statue thingy,

and ampersand pillow,

a font-fanatic purse,

an ampersand cutting board,

or a gorgeous 2 print for your wall.

Now, not that I know many kilt-wearers, but I really have to find someone to give this to:

Okay, everyone, time to go shopping!

Geek Item of the Day

2011-05-23T07:49:00.000-07:00

Mmmm. Yummy.

I Did It For the Nookie

2011-05-18T15:48:00.000-07:00

Ta da! Flat-Out Love is now available for the Nook. If I end up with some sort of Amazon-exclusive deal, I'll have to yank it down... But for now, it's all yours.

Math Joke of the Day

2011-05-15T09:39:00.000-07:00

Dirty joke, math style.

If you ask me, it's worth the three minutes. But I have a weird sense of humor, so...

Droplets

2011-05-13T12:19:00.000-07:00

Okay, fine. I give. Physics is kinda sexy and hot. (I think that this is porn for Matt...)

Adorable Geek of the Day

2011-05-12T11:39:00.000-07:00

Holy crap.

Behaving as One

2011-05-12T10:38:00.000-07:00

Let Quantum Physics Officiate Your Wedding!

Oh, good lord. This article is a riot. When I saw the headline, my first inclination was to laugh and roll my eyes, but then I read the piece. As my friend Adam said, "Sweet and incredibly geeky. But really sweet." So true.

I love this line: "The ceremony, developed by conceptual artist, Jonathon Keats, is borrowed from quantum physics, where when two or more subatomic particles become entangled, they behave as one." I mean, it's actually a really romantic concept... just presented rather oddly.

In other words, Matt would love, love, love this idea.

Geek Item of the Day

2011-05-10T06:14:00.000-07:00

Now that's an order!

Font Nerd Item of the Day

2011-05-08T15:25:00.000-07:00

Flat Finn is on Facebook

2011-05-08T12:19:00.000-07:00

Yes, yes, he is. So go add him as a friend by clicking here.

Well, How's This For a Review?

2011-05-04T17:33:00.000-07:00

Awww! I love Ambur Hostyn over at Burning.x.Impossibly.x.Bright. She gave me a great review for Relatively Famous and a wonderfully enthusiastic one for Flat-Out Love:

Jessica has created a story that will take its readers on a journey of love, growth, and loss. It was definitely one of my favourite books this year; the characters were amazing, and I loved the whole plot of the story, its progression was fantastic. This is one of those stories that once you start reading, everything comes together, and the truth falls into place and is revealed. The journey that you take as a reader to reach that part of the story is fabulous, and each page will leave you wanting more!

Thank you, Ambur! She is also hosting a giveaway where you can win a Kindle copy of Flat-Out Love.

Celeste's Song of the Day

2011-04-26T16:03:00.000-07:00

The Review to Die For

2011-04-24T14:28:00.000-07:00

Well, Lindsay from Just Another Book Addict completely made my weekend. My week. My month... Here are the highlights of her review, but please pop over to her site to see what else she has up. She is a complete sweetheart, and plowed through her carpal tunnel pain because she was so into this book. Not that I aim to cause suffering to my reviewers, but it's a nice testament to how engrossed she was!

"Can I just say that I absolutely adore Jessica? Seriously. For her to write such an intricate novel with these characters who are just so out of this world with their weirdness (that doesn't feel to weird) is just amazing. Oddly enough, I felt right at home next to this sophisticated, crazy-smart thirteen year old and this twenty-old year old who seemed obsessed with all things math, his laptop, and quirky t-shirts. I have Park's writing to thank for feeling so at home with these characters that are like none I've read before.

"This book was so outrageously good. I flat-out loved it. (See what I did there?) It's at the top of my favorites. It has surpassed...dare I say it?...my deeply beloved Nicholas Sparks. Totally different type of books but I'm trying to prove a point here. Oh what I would do to have a paperback of this book. Having an ebook just isn't the same.

Okay, I need to quit chatting and review. Park wrote a novel unlike any other. She wrote something that I did not want to put down. She wrote an addicting novel with addicting characters and truly makes me just another book addict. You have to read this book. Excuse me while I go all J. Lo on you. Characters? Check. Fantastic writing? Check. A book that clearly stands out among any other? Check. A book that is so wonderful that I practically demand that you buy it right now so we can talk about it? Check.

To Buy or To Borrow: Are you seriously asking me this?! Buy this book right this second. Why did you think I included the link? We are talking about a book that will stand out in your memory because there isn't a book out there that is like it. We are talking about a book that explores everything that was said in the Addict's Last Words."

Glee Night

2011-04-19T17:46:00.000-07:00

Thank God that Glee is back. I was beginning to have withdrawal symptoms. Let's celebrate with a few Celeste and Julie-approved videos.

Font Nerd Item of the Day #2

2011-04-19T12:04:00.000-07:00

Awe. Some.

Font Nerd Item of the Day

2011-04-19T11:13:00.000-07:00

You might need these font nerd cards one day.

Font Nerd Incident of the Day

2011-04-19T10:58:00.000-07:00

I love my font nerd, B. He's done massive amounts of work for me on covers and wrangled horrid PDF formatting issues for uploading my books to Amazon's Create Space. I have no idea what he's talking about half the time, but he's very helpful. I get looooong emails from him detailing lots of incomprehensible font facts. It's very cute, but just proves that--despite his claims that he is a recovering font nerd--he is obsessed with all things font-related. It's adorable. And he has a sense of humor about it as evidenced by his FB comment under my Flat-Out Love cookie picture:

Flat-Out Cookies

2011-04-19T10:49:00.000-07:00

Wow. Just... wow! My dear pal Lori sent me an awesome cookie version of Flat-Out Love. I simply can't stop laughing. This is so wonderful and hysterical.

Holy Hot Review!

2011-04-16T08:25:00.000-07:00

Well, this is quite a knockout review from The Book Labyrinth. I'm rather speechless! It means the world when a reviewer really takes the time to do such a thorough, heartfelt piece. A huge thank you to Ashley!

I loved this book! I loved it so much that I had to tweet about it after finishing it. I loved it so much that I’m already considering how long I should wait before re-reading it. Yes, I loved it that much. There was just a really special feel about this book. It totally gripped me in this really interesting way, and I hope that my descriptions can do it justice.

What I really loved about this book is that it is the perfect mix of family issues and love and romance. It is filled with impecible characterizations: even the smallest characters had personality. No one felt like they were just a filler name and face. Julie, our main character, is lovely. I felt like I knew her. In fact, all of the main characters felt real to me. It was a true family unit, and I cared about their situation.

Contemporary romance is one of my favourites, and the romance in this one is amazing because it’s a slow building, feel it in your stomach kind of love. I also love love when it’s not the only story being told, because that’s what real life is. Life is messy, with all kinds of issues getting in the way, and ‘Flat-Out Love’ doesn’t shy away from that. Like I said, this is also a story about a family and their issues. That drama spearheads the book and has the spotlight just as much as the romance does. My one minor qualm is that I wish there had been more about Julie’s first year in college, since that was what the book started off being about. However, I can understand why other things were focused on, and it didn’t minimize my enjoyment of the book.

Basically, this book just grabbed me and drew me in. The romance was quiet but lovely, and the family drama was always there, whether it be in the foreground or background. At times this story is intense with emotion, and other times it’s just funny, or sentimental, or silly. It has a delightful quirkiness to it (a whole character that is a lifesized cut-out of the absent brother? what?), yet you can tell throughout the story that there’s some deeper, possibly sinister, reality to it all. Unravelling the whole plot was fascinating, even when I made some correct guesses before Julie did herself. I don't often say that I highly recommend a book, but in this case: I highly recommend this book! Please check it out and support this awesome self-published author who has a ton of talent.

Flat-Out Love Sales Giveaway

2011-04-15T07:22:00.000-07:00

Lori over at Lori's Reading Corner is hosting a very cool contest where you could win big Amazon gift cards! It's a very easy entry, and you don't even have to buy the book (although, as you'll see, bigger sales number equal bigger prizes). Here are the details:

I'll be giving away gift certificates to Amazon (and to make this an international giveaway, the dollar equivalent can be ordered in books from The Book Depository).

The contest will start will the sales figures starting today - April 14, 2011

If Jessica sells 100 e-books by April 28th, I'll give away a $25 Gift Certificate.

If Jessica sells 250 e-books by May 12th, I'll give away a $50 Gift Certificate.

If Jessica sells 500 e-books by May 26th, I'll give away a $100 Gift Certificate.

If Jessica sells 1000 e-books by July 1, I'll give away away a secret Grand Prize.

Winners will be chosen at each interval, unless the sales amounts are not met. Then that gift certificate will be skipped and we better hit the sales goal for the next one.There can be anywhere from 0-3 gift certificates awarded, plus the secret grand prize. I hope my followers help me out here (I promise you won't be disappointed) and I can give away all three gift certificates and the grand prize.

All entrants will remain in the running for all the drawings (which hopefully there will be), so you're chances of winning increase with the amount of sales she reaches. You could win multiple times :)

Click here to enter!

Idiotic Video

2011-04-14T19:50:00.000-07:00

For my new readers who might not have seen this video I made during a rather aggravated mood that stemmed from 1. hating every New York editor around 2. frustration with trying to self-promote my books.

Cardboard Cutout of the Day

2011-04-14T17:40:00.000-07:00

Holy crap. How much do I NOT want to own one of these?

But I would take Chewbacca:

Or even better, A GODDAMN TALKING HAN SOLO. I don't even care that this is a particularly dorky picture. It f'ing talks!

Hello, Call Me Erma

2011-04-13T16:21:00.000-07:00

The best thing has just happened, and I have to record it here on this blog because it will quickly get lost in my stream of obsessive FB posts. A FB friend of mine just wrote me a glowing note, and he said, among other gems, that I am "the Erma Bombeck for a digital generation." Sigh. This is the coolest compliment ever.

And in what is to be a very short-lived moment of narcissism, I screen-captured my (what is surely fleeting) ranking at Amazon: #4,857.

Yeah, I know I'm not exactly at Amanda Hocking status (that girl is a genius, by the way), but it's a decent enough debut for a self-pubbed book. The last time I cracked the top #10,000 (no, there's not an extra zero there) was when my first book, Steamed, was published. My dad bought, like, twenty copies.

When a book is released, even with a major publisher, not much happens. Well, to typical authors. If you are some big-deal writer then maybe your publisher throws you a lavish book-launch party, sends an ostentatious floral display to your house, or jets you off on a book tour. My old publisher never sent a muffin basket, FYI, so self-publishing doesn't feel much different. I still do all the work and am still muffin-less. Not that I even like muffins, because I don't. I do, however, like coffee, so a nice box of gourmet coffee would have been a solid congratulatory gesture, but.... whatever.

The point is that I want to send out a huge round of gratitude to everyone who has bought Flat-Out Love today, and I hope you are all enjoying the story. And Julie, Matt, Celeste, and Flat Finn thank you for the support. You are our psychological version of a coffee-filled, floral-abounding touring launch party.

Pub Day

2011-04-12T19:07:00.000-07:00

Wow, Amazon was quick this time! I upload the book today before 1 pm, and it's already up for sale at 10 pm. Speedy, speedy.... The kindle download is only $2.99. A steal, yeah? So, without further ado, here is the cover!

Click here to purchase for the kindle

Getting Close...

2011-04-02T17:08:00.000-07:00

My cover artist, Robyn Hyzy, is working on the cover for Flat-Out Love and will be done sometime late next week. (For those of you who read mysteries, she is Julie Hyzy's daughter. Julie writes the wonderful White House Chef series.) She does absolutely beautiful work, and I knew within a few minutes of browsing her online art that she was the artist for this book. I'm guessing that the book will be for sale on Monday, April 12. Stay tuned!

Coming soon!

2011-03-24T11:09:00.001-07:00

FLAT-OUT LOVE is awaiting a cover and upload, but it should be available for purchase within the next few weeks. In the meantime, check out the book summary and sample chapters.